When Reaching Out is Difficult

I used to just not answer my phone.

If I was in a bad mood, if I was sad, if I was tired, if I was anything other than the 100% I expected you all to want me to be, I was MIA. "What could I possibly offer right now?" I'd wonder, silently slinking away from the people in my life. Who wants to talk to a sad girl, anyway??

Turns out, sweetpea's, that's exactly when we are SUPPOSED to pick up the phone. It's when we are down and trapped inside our minds that we need someone to help us OUT of it; a text from a friend can be a life raft in those moments; a call could be the vest that we strap on to keep from sinking.

It took me a while to come around to this, because seriously-- why would someone want my company when I feel like a boring lump that could cry at any moment? The answer is, it's not all about me. It's not all about my bad mood, my slump, or my "off day." What if they're struggling? Maybe they need someone to talk to- maybe they need a life raft too? I have to always remind myself that in order to save myself, I have to save others too.

When I feel myself slipping into an abyss, I can call someone and ask how THEIR day is going. How are they feeling? What are they looking forward to? What are they worried about? They don't call it a 10,000 pound telephone for nothing guys, but it truly is the 10,000 pound life raft sometimes too. So next time you're feeling the weight of the world close in, the storm cloud settling overhead and your worries accumulating like a rickety roller coaster in your mind-- jump out of that seat. Jump into someone else's. The surest way to save ourselves from darkness is to be a lighthouse for another